Esther 5:13, Question 1. To what does “this” refer?

יג וְכָלזֶה אֵינֶנּוּ שׁוֶֹה לִי בְּכָלעֵת אֲשֶׁר אֲנִי רֹאֶה אֶתמָרְדֳּכַי הַיְּהוּדִי יוֹשֵׁב בְּשַׁעַר הַמֶּלֶךְ

13. “And all of this is not worth anything for me all the time that I see Mordechai the Yehudi sitting in the gate of the king.”

  • As Rashi notes (Shemos 15:2), whenever a verse in TaNaCh uses the pronoun “zeh” (“this”), it refers to an object to which one could physically point. Therefore, the Talmud (Megillah 15b) teaches that Haman had tattooed symbols of his accomplishments onto his heart. He pointed at this tattoo when he was saying this.
  • The Beis Yaakov quotes that the Likutim MiPardes that the mispar katan (see note 24 above) of Mordechai (4+2+4+2+1=13) and Esther (1+6+4+2=13) together is 26. Similarly, the mispar katan of Haman (5+4+5=14) and Zeresh (7+2+3=12) is also 26. Therefore, Haman, consistently concerned with numerology and superstition, was telling his wife that she, whose mispar katan is equal to that of zeh (7+5=12), was not up to the mispar katan value of Mordechai, and thus not up to the challenge of defeating him.
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